No One Really Knows What They're Doing - And That's the Truth
I used to believe that adults had it all figured out.
They made educated and calculated decisions based on an encyclopedic knowledge of how the world works. There was one correct way to do things, and if you weren’t serious and "adulty" about it, you were doing it wrong. If you didn’t know what you were doing, people would look down their noses at you in judgment.
How untrue all that was!
The more I have stretched my comfort zone and worked alongside people I once deemed more professional, more competent, and smarter than myself, the more I’ve realized it’s all a load of BS.
Once you strip away the well-crafted facades—the ironed shirts, the fancy offices, the impressive certificates—you see the truth: they’re just winging it, same as the rest of us.
Sure, they may have a specific area of expertise, but that doesn’t mean they have all the answers. In fact, sometimes they know less because they’ve spent so much time mastering one thing. And then, there are those moments when you realize that some professionals are making it up entirely. That’s a real eye-opener!
Why Do We Think This Way? The Science Behind It
Psychologists suggest that our tendency to believe others know more than us comes from cognitive biases and societal conditioning. The illusion of authority makes us assume that people in positions of power or expertise have all the answers. Meanwhile, imposter syndrome convinces us that we are the only ones who feel unsure or unqualified, while everyone else appears competent and confident.
From childhood, we are taught to seek answers from "experts"—teachers, parents, professionals—reinforcing the idea that knowledge is hierarchical. But in reality, learning is ongoing, and even the most knowledgeable people are still figuring things out. The truth is, everyone is navigating life with a mix of experience, guesswork, and adaptation.
Questions to Reflect On
Have you ever assumed someone had it all figured out, only to realize they were just as uncertain as you?
How does the belief that others "know more" hold you back from taking action or trusting yourself?
In what areas of your life are you already an expert, even if you don’t feel like one?
What would change if you embraced the idea that everyone, even the most accomplished people, is still figuring things out?
So, release the pressure. Stop thinking that there are people out there who know more or are somehow inherently better than you. We all bring something different to the table. If we didn’t, we’d only be good at one thing—and that wouldn’t be very useful to anyone. Imagine if all we knew how to do was taxes. Yuck.
The truth is, no one has all the answers.
We’re all figuring it out as we go. And that’s not just okay—it’s liberating.
